Random Rant: Embracing Boundaries

Warning: The following blog post contains a rant with negative content. Reader discretion is advised.

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So, someone (unrelated to work) called me out for being rude because I didn't reply to a WhatsApp message. I have to admit, I purposely didn't respond because I didn't think it was important enough. It wasn't even a question, just some random information. I only reply to messages that contain questions. It's not that I'm trying to be rude or dismissive. It's not about ignoring people or devaluing their messages.

You see, I often find myself juggling responsibilities, from dealing with students' parents to handling inquiries from potential customers. Lately, I've been yearning for a break from it all. I sometimes wish I didn't have a smartphone and that someone else could take on the task of replying to all the messages I receive. It would be a tremendous help to have that burden lifted off my shoulders.

Please understand that I just want to set boundaries for myself too. When a total people pleaser like me starts ignoring what others might think of me, it means I was seriously drained and exhausted.

Yeah, I know I just kept justifying it. Call me rude anyway..

But, I ended up apologizing and explaining to that person that I couldn't reply to their messages at the moment. I felt overwhelmed and needed some space from my phone. At the moment, I just can't handle constantly checking it, except for important calls.

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I want to point out that this isn't my usual behavior. Usually, when I don't reply, it's unintentional because I'm swamped with stuff. I read the message, plan to reply later, but then life gets in the way, and I totally forget. 

Back when I was in university, I also had a crazy number of messages flooding in, maybe even more than what I deal with now. It was seriously overwhelming, you know? I was exhausted, but somehow, I managed to handle them all. Sure, I might have replied a bit late sometimes, but I always put in the effort to get back to everyone.

Yeah, I get it. I totally understand the importance of putting myself in their shoes. I mean, how would I feel if someone did the same thing to me? It would definitely hurt, no doubt about it. But here's the thing—I choose to give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they're going through some tough stuff, and that's why they didn't reply. I would never jump to calling them rude just because they didn't respond to my message. It's all about having some empathy and understanding that there's more to the story than meets the eye.

But you know what's funny? I used to be all about texting because I wasn't the best at fluent conversations. It made me anxious when I had to speak on the phone or have face-to-face conversation. But you won't believe it—I've had a total change of heart. These days, I find myself actually appreciating it when someone chooses to call me instead of sending a text. It's funny how things change, huh?  It just goes to show that change is inevitable, and we can adapt and grow in unexpected ways.

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When we're always trying to please everyone and be available 24/7, we end up draining ourselves. It's like we're on a mission to make everyone happy, but we forget about our own happiness and well-being in the process. That's where boundaries come in.

Setting boundaries means standing up for ourselves and saying, "Hey, I have limits too!" It's about recognizing that we can't be everything for everyone all the time. We get to decide when and how we engage with others, and that's a powerful thing. It's like reclaiming our own time and energy.

And that's where taking breaks comes into play. Taking breaks is like pressing the pause button on the chaos of life. It's about giving ourselves permission to step back, recharge, and focus on ourselves. We're not machines, after all. We need time to rest, relax, and do things that make us happy.

So, by setting boundaries and taking breaks, we're putting ourselves first. We're prioritizing our own needs and well-being. It's a way of showing ourselves some self-love and self-care. And trust me, when we take care of ourselves, we're better able to show up for others in a more authentic and meaningful way.

So, let's ditch the people-pleasing tendencies and embrace the power of boundaries and breaks. It's time to take care of ourselves and live life on our own terms. You deserve it. :)

Prioritizing myself,
Fafa Kyraa